Painful experiences lead to growth. This growth occurs through understanding. Understanding through awareness of pain will allow to break the attachment that causes the pain. Observation of self reaps the rewards of suffering. This breaking is not a separation, but instead it is the ceasing of grasping it in the first place.
An analogy is the touching of a hot pot on a stove. The pot hurts you when it is touched. Suffering occurs. Is the appropriate reaction to throw the pot away? No. If the pot were thrown away, the new pot would be as hot, and the hand would continue to be burned. The appropriate reaction is to understand how to pick up the pot without being burned. When we are asleep and unaware we touch the hot pot again and again. Suffering is not discontinued. Getting relief only postpones future pain. Psychotherapy and counseling can relieve pain and suffering, not cure it or use it for awareness. This relief of suffering is like getting a healing salve and bandage over the burned hand. It may heal, but if we touch the pot again, we will get burned again and the salve and bandage did not good.
Why do you and I keep touching the pot? Why do we continue to be burned for uncountable times? Why did the big pile of discarded salve bottles and bandages do no good?
Consider happiness to be the opposite of suffering.
· True happiness is uncaused. Uninterrupted happiness is uncaused.
· YOU cannot make me happy. YOU are not my happiness.
· Happiness is a natural state.
· Suffering is caused by stupidity and clinging to society, culture, and others.
Happiness cannot be acquired. Why? You already have it! You have it like a mud puddle has pure water. When you drop tour illusions and attachments, the happiness is there. When the mud is removed from the puddle, a basin of pure water is present. Happiness causes life to become easy and delightful. Happiness is only hard on your illusions, your ambitions, your greed and your cravings. Where do these come from? From identification and attachment and cravings!