April 6th, 2014

Shaman - Horse

Advice About Social Bones

A friend wrote:

My social bone must be broken... I can't figure out how to people properly.... I feel like I am on the wrong planet, existing in the wrong dimension or trying to connect with a foreign specie. What is the fix?!

I replied with:

#1: Know your own strengths and weaknesses. These can be identified through personality tests or just through an understanding of where you stand on the introvert, extrovert, introverted extrovert, and extroverted introvert. I recently found out that I'm an introverted extrovert. A surprise to me, but it makes sense.

#2: Work with size groups that are compatible with your personality type. Large groups freak out an introvert. Small groups don't sit well with an extrovert. The middle ground between the two is interesting too. Be kind to yourself if you are close to somebody who is a contrary personality to your own. Give people their space and ask for the same.

#3: Are you interested in pushing your limits? Do so with kindness. Give yourself lots of credit when it is due and don't beat yourself up as you struggle. Life is not on a schedule. Fulfillment can take an instant or a lifetime. Both usually!

#4: Depression sucks the life out of a social life. The social life is a symptom for bigger challenges. If that is the case... well, focus on addressing the depression. Life will approve, including the sociable side!