This could explain why I can only remember / feel / intuit being in love a number of times you can count on one hand. While I am capable of loving, and more than able of being in lust, I seem to resist being in love. It is an aberration in my life, something is that is far from the norm. I wonder if this is normal and healthy. I suspect committed monogamous relationships are benefited by a sense of being in love. I also sense the that a person who is in a serial state of being in love would find it very difficult to settle into a health(ier) committed relationship.
Why do I resist? Perhaps I overly indulge the being in lust side of life. There is evidence that this too prevalent in my life. Am I too busy being in lust to find the time to be in love? Am I weak, strong, or just human in my foibles? This being in love thing is kicking my butt. The new and unfamiliar things usually do.