Big Rowan Ackison (greensh) wrote,
Big Rowan Ackison

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Denial as Pretending

Joy... my other blog entry from today got me looking at denial. A google search showed the following information about denial as part of the Kübler-Ross Grief Cycle.

In the Kübler-Ross Grief Cycle, the second stage is one of blind denial. In order, the stages are: Shock, Denial, Anger, Bargaining, Depression, Testing, Acceptance.

After the initial shock has worn off, the next stage is usually one of classic denial, where they pretend that the news has not been given. They effectively close their eyes to any evidence and pretend that nothing has happened.

Typically, they will continue their life as if nothing has happened. In the workplace, they will carry on doing their job even if that job is no longer required.

A classic behavior here is a 'flight into health', where previously-perceived problems are suddenly seen as having miraculously fixed themselves.

You can move a person out of denial by deliberately provoking them to anger. Hold up the future (sympathetically) so they cannot avoid or deny it. Tell them that it is not fair. Show anger yourself (thus legitimizing that they get angry).

This, to some extent, is done on daytime TV shows where people in precarious situations are prodded into emotional explosions that make good TV and (where sympathetically done) may even be good for them.

See also
Coping Mechanisms

Elisabeth Kübler-Ross, On Death and Dying, Macmillan, NY, 1969

Pretending because of denial has me at stage two. I have the transitions of anger, bargaining, depression and testing to look forward too. Happy happy, joy joy. I guess it is time to get angry.
Tags: Kübler-Ross, denial, pretend, pretending

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