The other night my lovely wife had a dream in which she was recalled to the Navy. She was asked to share personnel quarters with a transgendered guy. She refused and he was moved to male quarters. He ended up suing my wife and the Navy for discriminating against him. Her position was that he may think of himself as a woman, but he still looked like a guy and that wasn't cool with her.
I related to her my experience with women's sweat lodges. My ex-wife used to go to women's only sweat lodges. The rule was that only people with the right plumbing could attend. While it was geared towards the comfort level and life references of the participants, the organizers did not work with any cues to sexual orientation. This means that gay guys could not attend but gay women could. The gay guys, especially effeminate ones, could perhaps relate to the feminine experience and have no sexual interest in the other participants. In theory the especially masculine women may not as much relate to the feminine experience and have sexual interest in the other participants. In these theoretical cases it didn't matter because the guy's plumbing was wrong and the gal's plumbing was right.
This puzzled me, but my wife's dream sheds some light on this apparent unfairness. Plumbing is plumbing. A person with the wrong equipment, no matter how much they identify with the feminine side of life, is not appreciated when people react to visual cues.
What do you think? I'm just a guy theorizing this stuff and I could still be miles off.