Big Rowan Ackison (greensh) wrote,
Big Rowan Ackison

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Things I Learn from TV

I learn a lot from watching TV. For instance... watching shows like Law & Order: Special Victims Unit have taught me that everyone lies to the police. Yes, I mean everyone, even people that don't seem to have a reason. 

I'll give you a for example... a person is killed with no witnesses.   There is a pile of mail and a little rubber ball with a small hole at the scene.   The postman says that he was nowhere near the house.  The evidence says he is, and the postman confesses that he did deliver the mail, but did not kill the man.  The postman explains that he heard the victim arguing with a man with a high pitched voice.  The investigator finds the midget clown that argued with the victim.  He only confesses after saying he was across town.  Evidence says otherwise, and the clown confesses that he was at the house, but the entire clown car was also there, parked in the backyard.  All off the clowns say they weren't there, but later confess when faced with the evidence.  And so on... eventually the guy's wife, who originally said she was out of town at her sister's house, confesses to being jealous of the clowns.  She pushed her husband, he slipped on the clown nose and his head hit the side of the table..  The verdict: death by clown fetish jealousy.   It takes an hour to get there, but if everyone told the truth the show would be all of five minutes long.

So why do people lie so much on these shows?  I'll look at that in another blog entry.

Tags: goren, murder, tv

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