Big Rowan Ackison (greensh) wrote,
Big Rowan Ackison

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Our Beliefs

A very lovely and spiritual friend of mine posted "I receive all things according to my belief. If I don't like what I am receiving, I can change my beliefs". Part of me struggles with this saying.

First of all, I have a firm belief that I really don't want to be here, but I am still here. I've believed this for years, but yet I continue on the mortal coil. Does this mean I don't REALLY believe this? This could be. The vast majority of my sleeping dreams are void of the soul crushing depression I experience during waking hours. Does this mean that the saying applies to both concious and subconcious, and that the subconcious can trump the concious?

Secondly... there is the quote attributed to Woody Allen, "“If you want to make God laugh, tell him about your plans.” Again this appears to be true in my case. I am also heartened by the Sinfest cartoon in which the lead character says "I'm done!  I quit!  Take me way big guy!".  A heavenly voice answers back "You haven't even begun to live.".

Sigh...  so does this saying about beliefs have a spiritual safety valve, a method of diverting self-destruction?  It seems so.

Tags: belief, depression, suicide

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