Big Rowan Ackison (greensh) wrote,
Big Rowan Ackison
greensh

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Poem - Many a Day

One of my incredibly dear friends is on my social media alert feed. While I see their uplifting memes and event notices often, I’ve not spoken to them in too many years. We used to speak every day, and now I am a specter haunting their shadow. I wondered why this was, and the results of my thoughts became the poem “Many a Day”.

Many a Day

It's been many a day
the wheel has turned round
more times than the cat's lives
since we've spoken as pals.
This is my fault
no blame to you friend
for I have a secret
that I'd like to share.

I would speak of my life
in honest discussion
to a person who's seen
my every conveyance.
Yet I find myself unable
to reach out to you
by a wall too imposing
created by fear.

This is the crux of the all matter
that you've heard this all before
and yet here I am again
still in my own hell.
I’m all tied in knots
of shame built on itself
of progress not made
where is my voice.

I once had much promise
doors waiting to open
you saw this power
I’ve failed to provide.
No promises were made
none expected by you
yet a stumble by me
is a slight made to you.

I can put on the mask
for others less close
make brave while I die
I cannot hide from you.
You’ll see me the fraud
broken not growing
this is my dread
I share on this day.

© 2016, Sean Green. All Rights Reserved, 20160608.
Tags: poem, self-esteem
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