Big Rowan Ackison (greensh) wrote,
Big Rowan Ackison

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Poem - I'm Sorry

A new self-awareness and empowerment movement is afoot, embodied in the book, “The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck”. It says: “take care of yourself, don't care what other people think”. Here's the rub. I care too much about what other people think. I care to the point that I have lost the desire to be competitive. I care to the point that my self-worth is not my own. Why? My contracts, what I’ve agreed to do or be, have been some of the few things holding me here. Now even the contracts are fracturing as I find myself unable to satisfy the terms. What is left? Perhaps a final apology.

I'm Sorry

I apologize to the world
for imperfections they endure
while I struggle to commit
to the covenants in which I’m snared

righteousness flows so easily
assurity of what should be
demands put the lesser folk
this servant jumps when provoked

to find favor with masters' wish
remedies must be put in place
no room to deviate
from requests a world dictates

failure is the final way
invertible by fate's mandate
leaving me with little fare
to support my flawed discourse

the positive is an accident
recognition is the mistake
aberrations that I dismiss
just wait until I fall again

then there are the skeletons
rows in closets I keep barred
from the eyes that would denote
failings not overlooked

there is one fix that will resolve
the chain of errors I evoke
while it's the greatest of them all
at least it bring this to an end

this is my hope before I go
the parting gift of a pained soul
a last apology for all mankind
'I'm sorry' done one more time.

© 2017. Sean Green. All Rights Reserved. 20171115.
Tags: depression, poem

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